Have You Seen My Woody?

Hi Everyone. Sometime Between 17:30 Hours Monday August 14th And 7:00 Hours Thursday August 17th, A Brutal Act Of TERRORISM Was Committed In CHB (my place of work). “Woody” Was Toy-Napped From His Home. We Have Reason To Believe He Is Being Held Against His Will At An Undisclosed Location In CHB. Please Forward Any Information Leading To The Recovery Of Woody And Apprehension Of The TERRORISTS Involved In This Inhuman Toy-Napping.

More information to follow.